2020: A Year of Being More Selfish

Here’s to another year of hearing everyone’s empty promises to themselves about how they are going to improve their life. Speaking it into existence: my resolutions are going to be acted upon. You should believe the same and start working towards a better life for the new year and new decade. You don’t need a new calendar year to start working towards your goals, start right after you finish reading this, start making it a habit now!

My ultimate vision for 2020 is to start putting myself first, be more selfish, you could say. Of course, I fully intend to keep my selfless personality. However, it is time for me to start doing things solely for myself. Everything that I’ve done is ultimately done out of love and the intent to help another. It’s not a bad thing, but for years I put my own needs on the back burner. I’m still going to go out of my way to help someone, that’s just who I am, but this year I’ll also be helping myself more often. That means saying no more often and doing things that fuel my passions and bring me closer to my goals outside of school. 2020 will be a year of keeping entirely in touch with myself and striving to make time for my passions.

Along with that, I intend to express myself on what’s really going on in my life to stop putting my own needs on the back burner. I don’t know how many times I’ve written that you shouldn’t struggle in silence, yet in my everyday life, I do brush my struggles under the rug and mask them with positivity. Again, I’m still going to go out of my way to spread positivity, but people in my life should know that there’s more going on in my head than sunshine and rainbows. I hope that trying to express myself more will lead people to understand me beyond my exterior more because I am a confusing person to understand when I block people from my emotions.

Lastly, this will be the year that I reach complete mental happiness, no more fake energy. While I’ve been succeeding these past couple of years, I haven’t been able to find genuine pleasure through my attributes. I’ve learned to be proud of myself and believe that I deserve what I’ve earned, but something is missing mentally that is blocking me from full potential. Sadly, I don’t know what it is, but it has been shaking my confidence for many years. By focusing on myself, my goal is to find my missing piece and find the mental happiness that I desire.

2020 will be a year of me, myself, and I without compromising who I am on the inside.

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